David Bowie Makes Surprise Appearance alongside Hillary Clinton at UNICEF Gala

Absolute Beginners

David Bowie made a rare post mortem appearance at the UNICEF Gala alongside Hillary Clinton last night and sang his popular hit song Let’s Dance.   Bowie altered the lyrics especially for Hillary.

Let’s dance put on your glass slipper and dance the blues

Let’s dance under the glass ceiling to Melania’s song
they’re playin’ on the radio

Let’s sway
back and forth on issue after issue while Bernie’s numbers go up in the polls

Let’s sway
sway through the crowd of millenials with an empty space in their heads

If you say run, I’ll run with you
If you say hide, we’ll hide under the glass ceiling
Because my love for you
Would break my heart in two
If you should fall
from your high pedestal
like a cigar

Let’s dance for fear
your grace should fall
Let’s dance for fear tonight it’s all over for you

Let’s sway you could look into Trump’s eyes
Let’s sway under the glass ceiling,
this serious ceiling

If you say run, I’ll run with you
If you say hide, we’ll hide in the hotel room doing cocaine together
Because my love for you
Would break my heart in two
If you should fall
Into my arms
And tremble like a loser

Let’s dance put on your glass shoes
and dance the blues

Let’s dance Melania’s song
they’re playin’ on the radio

Let’s sway you could look into Trump’s eyes
Let’s sway under the glass ceiling,
this serious glass ceiling

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Clinton Political Machine Employs Communist Jewish Agitator Jill Stein to Voice Displeasure over Election Results

Stein's Communist Supporters in Houston

Stein’s Communist Supporters in Houston

Hillary Clinton is said to be spending most of her days coked up and seething, unable to accept being triumphantly trampled by Trump.

In the meantime, Bill Clinton, now feeling remorseful and sorry for the wife he has mentally abused for the past 40 years or so has decided to do something nice for her, thus he has sought out and funded Commie Jewish Agitator Jill Stein, to sue for vote recounts in a couple of States that had close voting results.

Communist Jewish Agitator Stein is known for her activism, but intelligent people across America know a communist when they see one, and she has RED written all over her.

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The Unbearable Smugness of Will Rahn

will-rahn

Will Rahn is a mainstream media trollop often mistaken for a hunchback due to the fact that his ass generally sits way up high in the air.

In his latest article, The unbearable smugness of the pressRahn flat out admits the mainstream media attempted to cook the election with Clinton propaganda:

“Had Hillary Clinton won, there’s be a winking “we did it” feeling in the press, a sense that we were brave and called Trump a liar and saved the republic.”

Notice the incorrect grammar with the [‘s] where there should be a [‘d].  But hey, Will’s ass remains high in the air.

Rahn goes on to say:

“Journalists love mocking Trump supporters. We insult their appearances. We dismiss them as racists and sexists. We emote on Twitter about how this or that comment or policy makes us feel one way or the other, and yet we reject their feelings as invalid.

It’s a profound failure of empathy in the service of endless posturing.”

Quite bluntly, Will Rahn and his ilk(the majority of mainstream yellow journalists) are pusillanimous pretentious pretenders.  They pretend to be much they most certainly are not, including ‘intellectually superior’, ‘elite’, ‘trend setters’ ‘the in-crowd’ and ‘the intelligentsia’.  The problem is, most of Will’s comrades currently passing themselves off as journalists these days are under-educated, snot-nosed kids fresh out of college with limited vocabularies and severely limited life experience.

The Will Rahn portrayal of the so called “uneducated Trump voter” is so far off the mark, one must wonder if Will has ever traveled beyond his own neighborhood.  There are far more “uneducated trump voter” farmers across the American South who can quote from Shelley, Keats, Tennyson, and Shakespeare than “elite journalists” having graduated from Columbia or the Walter Cronkite School of Journalism and Mass Communication over the past twenty years or so. The ignorance on display by the U.S press corp is appalling.  The typos, misused language, and utter ignorance of American and world history is on display daily in the mainstream media.

Yes Will, you and your ilk got it wrong, but your analysis of why you got it wrong is way off the mark.

You got it wrong because you continue to commit the most egregious offense there is in professional journalism, that being creating the news and interjecting your own views, values, idealism, and opinions into the news.

 

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Clinton Supporters Still Crying Two Weeks After the Election, Literally

crying

Hillary Clinton supporters across the nation are still in tears today two weeks after the election.  Says one supporter from New York City,

“I just can’t help myself, I pass Jarvis Plaza on my way to work everyday and when I see that glass ceiling…I just start crying!”

Says another supporter from Chicago:

“I don’t know how I’m gonna make my monthlies if Trump cuts my check, I done told Tyrone he better hide his Obama phone…shiit…I been crying for days!

Another Clinton supporter from Portland had this to say:

“I been crying and protesting, crying and protesting…and smoking a little crack in between!

Meanwhile up in Denver a Clinton protester is worried about losing her medical marijuana card:

“I’m in so much pain, I need my Mary Jane and I’m worried Trump won’t let us smoke and I just start crying.”

Across the pond, Kay Burley of Sky News says:

“I cry every morning when I think of Donald Trump, I feel like an utter failure as a UK Sky News anchorwoman.  I have jumped off of two bridges to no avail.  Me fat arse broke both falls and I just started crying.”

Meanwhile back as CBSN HQ, Les Moonves’ prize reporters Vladimir Duthier, Elaine Quijano and Nancy “Thunder Thighs” Cordes admit:

“We have a group cry every morning, and when Chief White House Correspondent Major Garret and Yellow News Producer Chloe Arensberg show up, we cry some more.”

 

 

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CBS CEO Les Moonves Promotes CBSN Political Correspondent Major Garrett to New Role

Major Garrett – VP of CHAOS T

CBS CEO Les Moonves has promoted Major Garrett,  his prize political correspondent, to a new role.

Garrett, whose role over the past year has been Team Leader of CHUMP T or CBS Has Ulterior Motive to Perseverate  on Trump, will now serve as Vice President of CHAOS T, or CBS Has Another Objective to Stop Trump.

CEO Les Moonves stated emphatically that Garrett is the man for the job.  Says Moonves:

“Garrett has been in the game for a long time.  As Team Leader of CHUMP T, Major consistently delivered day after day and we foresee he will be just as effective as VP of CHAOS T. “

Garrett’s first assignment as VP of CHAOS T is to appear on CBSN and whine like a whipped puppy every time President Elect Donald Trump sneaks out of the Trump Tower without a news correspondent in tow.

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A Handful of Silly Millennials Protest the Election and Take Selfies

hillary-supporters

A Handful of silly Millennials took to the streets last night across America to take selfies and protest their loss of self-esteem after learning that the two trophies they received each year in school are meaningless in the real world, much less able to stop the Trump machine from taking office.

Some contemplated suicide.

Our advice: Go Ahead and Jump!

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Polishing the Glass Ceiling

glass-ceiling
Polishing the glass ceiling
grinning from ear to ear
Hillary says the task is easier while guzzling Falstaff1 beer

– think Shakespeare here

Polishing the glass ceiling
makes everything quite clear
as Hillary secretly sends a transgender email to all her little queers

Polishing the glass ceiling
selling that progressive fear
Hillary deploys her storm troopers to Portland to bend Rachel Maddow’s ear

Polishing the glass ceiling
Hillary’s been doing it for years
Bill and Monika share a Cuban while sipping Bruja beer

Polishing the glass ceiling
Elicits Millennial tears
as Hillary teaches entitlement and swills down another beer

Polishing the glass ceiling
It’s been quite a year
Trump will never be President they shouted
Trump is joke
Trump is 14 points behind in the polls
Trump is not doing well Wisconsin

TRUMP IS PRESIDENT!

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Scottish Architect Sir Basil Spence

sir-basil-spence

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Plandai Biotechnology Share Price Doubles but so do the Number of Shares Outstanding

snakeoil

Shares of Plandai Biotechnology PLPL have more than doubled this week closing today at slightly over 4 cents per share up from 1.3 cents per share last week.  However, investors(speculators) looking to jump on the Marijuana band wagon to make a fast buck during election season may wish to read the company’s latest SEC filings which shows Plandai expanding its shares outstanding from 500 million to 1 billion.  Under section 5 of their most recent 8-K filing, we learn the following:

Section 5 - Corporate Governance and Management

Item 5.03 Amendments to Articles of Incorporation or Bylaws; Change in Fiscal
Year.

Item 5.07 Submission of Matters to a Vote of Security Holders.

(a) On September 9, 2016, shareholders representing 54% of the issued and        
     outstanding shares eligible to vote convened a special meeting of the        
     shareholders and approved an amendment to the Company’s articles of          
     incorporation to increase the number of issued and outstanding shares from   
     500 million shares to 1 billion shares. The Articles of Amendment were filed 
     with the Secretary of State of Nevada on September 15, 2016.

Diluting the shares in such a manner is generally a management ploy that is used when a gimmick is needed to inflate a company’s share price due to lack of earnings.

My guess is PLPL will plummet back to a penny as soon as investors wise up to the facts involved in these filings. My sixth sense tells me that the inflation of the number of shares was most likely designed to take advantage of the presidential election news cycle in which several states will be voting on legalization of marijuana.  One might be inclined to wonder if the smart money is dumping shares as this is being written.  I would lay odds that the owners just sold a boatload of shares and pocketed a tidy sum of money today.  But that is just speculation…

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How to Butcher a Welsh or English Lamb

welsh-lambs

Welsh Lamb

English Lamb

Bone out Leg of Lamb

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Rocky Mountain High Brands Moves Forward and Gains OTC QB Listing

hemp

Rocky Mountain High Brands is a Dallas, Texas based company that has been trading in the penny stock market as a pink sheet stock. They recently have been approved as an OTC QB traded company.  This is a step up for the company as it brings them greater exposure to potential investors.  RMHB currently trades at .04 cents per share.

Potential investors should keep in mind that penny stocks are considered much riskier than stocks trading a $5.00 per share and higher. In most cases, institutional investors such as pension funds and hedge funds are not allowed by their boards to invest in such companies.

Interview with CEO of Rocky Mountain Brands

Click here to view the Rocky Mountain High Brands website.

Click here for recent news on Rocky Mountain High Brands from the OTCMarkets.com website.

Disclaimer and Caution: This article is not an endorsement for Rocky Mountain High Brands and The Last American Newspaper does not receive compensation for discussing publicly traded companies.  As with all investments, potential investors should consult with a financial adviser prior to investing in any publicly traded company. It is my personal opinion that individuals who do not have the financial wherewithal, an advanced understanding of the stock market, and sufficient moral character to weather a 100% loss of capital should steer clear of investing in the stock market, as a regular interest bearing savings account or a piggy bank might be prove more suitable. 

 

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The Hatha Yoga Pradipika

yogi

THE HATHA YOGA PRADIPIKA

Translated into English by
PANCHAM SINH

Panini Office, Allahabad
[1914]

INTRODUCTION.

There exists at present a good deal of misconception with regard to the practices of the Haṭha Yoga. People easily believe in the stories told by those who themselves heard them second hand, and no attempt is made to find out the truth by a direct reference to any good treatise. It is generally believed that the six practices, in Haṭha Yoga are compulsory on the student and that besides being dirty, they are fraught with danger to the practiser. This is not true, for these practices are necessary only in the existence of impurities in the Nâdis, and not otherwise. Continue reading The Hatha Yoga Pradipika

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Wine Making

wine-gal

 

Wine Making 

Grapes are the world’s leading fruit crop and the eighth most important food crop in the world, exceeded only by the principal cereals and starchytubers. Though substantial quantities are used for fresh fruit, raisins, juice and preserves, most of the world’s annual production of about 60 million metric tons is used for dry (nonsweet) wine.

Wine is of great antiquity, as every Bible reader knows, and a traditional and important element in the daily fare of millions.   Used in moderation, it is wholesome and nourishing, and gives zest to the simplest diet.  It is a source of a broad range of essential minerals, some vitamins, and easily assimilated calories provided by its moderate alcoholic content. Continue reading Wine Making

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The Price of Hillary Clinton’s Books Plummet on eBay

It Takes a Village

The price of Hillary Clinton’s books to include It Takes a Village and Hard Choices is dropping like a rock after last nights election results.

Her next book due out sometime next year, How I Spent my Life Polishing the Glass Ceiling, is sure to be blockbuster.

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Free Post Election Trophies Available for Hillary’s Millenials

trophy-png-23

If you are a millennial Hillary supporter and feeling a bit down today, we have good news!

Send an email to freetrophy@thelastamericannewspaper.com explaining how you feel and we will send you a consolation trophy, one similar to the two you received every year since kindergarten for doing nothing.

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Ought King Leopold to be Hanged?

congo

Interview by Mr. W.T. Stead with the Rev. John H. Harris, Baringa, Congo State, in the English Review of Reviews for September, 1905

For the somewhat startling suggestion in the heading of this interview, the missionary interviewed is in no way responsible. The credit of it, or, if you like, the discredit, belongs entirely to the editor of the Review, who, without dogmatism, wishes to pose the question as a matter for serious discussion. Since Charles I’s head was cut off, opposite Whitehall, nearly two hundred and fifty years ago, the sanctity which doth hedge about a king has been held in slight and scant regard by the Puritans and their descendants. Hence there is nothing antecedently shocking or outrageous in the discussion of the question whether the acts of any Sovereign are such as to justify the calling in of the services of the public executioner. It is not, of course, for a journalist to pronounce judgment, but no function of the public writer is so imperative as that of calling attention to great wrongs, and no duty is more imperious than that of insisting that no rank or station should be allowed to shield from justice the real criminal when he is once discovered. Continue reading Ought King Leopold to be Hanged?

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Restaurant Style Steaks

a1

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Crimes of the European Union – Committed by King Leopold II of Belgium

congo-hands

Click here to read The Casement Report on the Congo

Click on the link below for faster download. File Size – 55.6MB

The Casement Report on the Congo - 55.6MB

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American Logging Photos with the Music of Ralph Stanley

logging
 

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Franklin Delano Roosevelt – Second Fireside Chat – An Accurate Transcription

fdr-chat

The downloadable audio clip is of FDR’s Second Fireside Chat recorded on May 7th, 1933.  

The transcript that follows is my corrected version of the transcript that is found The American Presidency Project website that was created by Gerhard Peters and Professor John T. Woolley of  the University of California, Santa Barbara Political Science Department.

I am not sure why the available transcription and seemingly most other transcriptions of FDR’s Second Fireside Speech are so poor other than perhaps the transcriptions are copies of the written speech rather true transcriptions of the delivered and recorded speech. Continue reading Franklin Delano Roosevelt — Second Fireside Chat — An Accurate Transcription

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US Coast Guard Information for Boaters

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RADIO INFORMATION FOR BOATERS

Effective 01 August, 2013, the U. S. Coast Guard terminated its radio guard of the international voice distress, safety and calling frequency 2182 kHz and the international digital selective calling (DSC) distress and safety frequency 2187.5 kHz. Additionally, marine information and weather broadcasts transmitted on 2670 kHz will terminate concurrently. See the safety alert. Note that these frequencies are still available and in use, notwithstanding the Coast Guard’s termination of the radio guard. Please contact us if you have any questions. Continue reading US Coast Guard Information for Boaters

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Townes Van Zandt

Singer-Songwriter Townes Van Zandt in Concert at "Kult" Niederstetten, Germany Date23 November 1995 Photo by Michael Schwarz

Singer-Songwriter Townes Van Zandt in Concert at “Kult” Niederstetten, Germany
Date 23 November 1995
Photo by Michael Schwarz

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Coffee and Cigarettes

ernie-pyle

Aw, the good old days, meet in the coffee shop with a few friends, click open the Zippo, inhale a glorious nosegay of lighter fluid, fresh roasted coffee and a Chesterfield cigarette….

A Meta-analysis of Coffee Drinking, Cigarette Smoking, and the Risk of Parkinson’s Disease

We conducted a systematic review to summarize the epidemiological evidence on the association between cigarette smoking, coffee drinking, and the risk of Parkinson’s disease. Case–control and cohort studies that reported the relative risk of physician-confirmed Parkinson’s disease by cigarette smoking or coffee drinking status were included. Study-specific log relative risks were weighted by the inverse of their variances to obtain a pooled relative risk and its 95% confidence interval (CI). Results for smoking were based on 44 case–control and 4 cohort studies, and for coffee 8 case–control and 5 cohort studies. Compared with never smokers, the relative risk of Parkinson’s disease was 0.59 (95% CI, 0.54–0.63) for ever smokers, 0.80 (95% CI, 0.69–0.93) for past smokers, and 0.39 (95% CI, 0.32–0.47) for current smokers. The relative risk per 10 additional pack-years was 0.84 (95% CI, 0.81–0.88) in case–control studies and 0.78 (95% CI, 0.73–0.84) in cohort studies. Compared with non–coffee drinkers, relative risk of Parkinson’s disease was 0.69 (95% CI, 0.59–0.80) for coffee drinkers. The relative risk per three additional cups of coffee per day was 0.75 (95% CI, 0.64–0.86) in case–control studies and 0.68 (95% CI, 0.46–1.00) in cohort studies. This meta-analysis shows that there is strong epidemiological evidence that smokers and coffee drinkers have a lower risk of Parkinson’s disease. Further research is required on the biological mechanisms underlying this potentially protective effect.

Click here to read the full study entitled: A Meta-analysis of Coffee Drinking, Cigarette Smoking, and the Risk of Parkinson’s Disease  Home
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The Legendary A.P. McCoy

toney-mccoy

Sir Anthony Peter McCoy has broken more bones than he can count and has a fused disc in his lower back adding new meaning to “ironclad backbone”.

A quiet man, A.P., as he is known in the sporting world, works hard.  When others are at the pub topping a pint, A.P. is on the track working a horse.

Standing a shoulder above other riders at 5’10”, A.P. McCoy is the world’s greatest jockey with over 4300 wins under his belt.  During the last ten years of his twenty-three year career, A.P. rode 200 winning horses each year, often jumping into a helicopter to shuttle from one race to another. Career milestones include winning the Cheltenham Gold Cup, Champion Hurdle, Queen Mother Champion Chase, King George VI Chase and the 2010 Grand National.

Now 42 and semi-retired, he has broken more records than any jockey, dead or alive.   I say semi-retired because after watching Being A.P., a recently shot documentary, I suspect he’s not the kind of fella to not lay about the house idle.  If there is a horse out there demanding a world class rider, A.P. is likely to step back into the winner’s circle.

Below is the trailer for Being A.P., the new documentary now available on Netflix and an older video made earlier in his career.

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Are You Being Choked Out of Your Oil and Gas Royalty Check?

gas-well

Drilling partnership can pay off handsomely provided the well comes in and flows at an economical production rate. However, many investors across the nation have been hoodwinked by oil and gas corporations with clever accounting tricks and an industry procedure known as choking.

Now if you are from the generation that had to fiddle with carburetors on automobiles, then you might have an idea  as to what it means to choke off a throttle.

When applied to an oil or a gas well it simply means using a mechanical device to restrict the flow of the well to a desired production rate, the idea being to choke it back when prices are low and then change the choke to allow a greater flow when prices are high.  It makes sense for the oil company but may not be profitable if you are a royalty owner hoping for a big payoff. Continue reading Are You Being Choked Out of Your Oil and Gas Royalty Check?

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Of Interest to Heavy Drinkers: Cleansing the Liver with Northern Ground Cone (Boschniaka rossica)

Boschniakia rossica northeast of Cordova, Alaska, USA - Photo by Malcolm Manners

Boschniakia rossica northeast of Cordova, Alaska, USA – Photo by Malcolm Manners

The following research discussion is from a study funded by the U.S. National Institute of Health entitled: Boschniakia rossica prevents the carbon tetrachloride-induced hepatotoxicity in rat.  It may be of interest to heavy drinkers. Continue reading Of Interest to Heavy Drinkers: Cleansing the Liver with Northern Ground Cone (Boschniaka rossica)

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Storing Drinking Water in Copper Vessels for Microbial Purification

copper-pitcher

Are you considering purchasing a copper water pitcher for storing drinking water but have questions about the effects on your health?

The following study may help jump-start your research.

Storing Drinking-water in Copper pots Kills Contaminating Diarrhoeagenic Bacteria

ABSTRACT

Microbially-unsafe water is still a major concern in most developing countries. Although many water-purification methods exist, these are expensive and beyond the reach of many people, especially in rural areas. Ayurveda recommends the use of copper for storing drinking-water. Therefore, the objective of this study was to evaluate the effect of copper pot on microbially-contaminated drinking-water. The antibacterial effect of copper pot against important diarrhoeagenic bacteria, including Vibrio cholerae O1, Shigella flexneri 2a, enterotoxigenic Escherichia coli, enteropathogenic E. coli, Salmonella enterica Typhi, and Salmonella Paratyphi is reported. When drinking-water (pH 7.83±0.4; source: ground) was contaminated with 500 CFU/mL of the above bacteria and stored in copper pots for 16 hours at room temperature, no bacteria could be recovered on the culture medium. Recovery failed even after resuscitation in enrichment broth, followed by plating on selective media, indicating loss of culturability. This is the first report on the effect of copper on S. flexneri 2a, enteropathogenic E. coli, and Salmonella Paratyphi. After 16 hours, there was a slight increase in the pH of water from 7.83 to 7.93 in the copper pots while the other physicochemical parameters remained unchanged. Copper content (177±16 ppb) in water stored in copper pots was well within the permissible limits of the World Health Organization. Copper holds promise as a point-of-use solution for microbial purification of drinking-water, especially in developing countries.

Click here to read the entire study.

Click here to read more on the topic of water stored in copper vessels.

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The Character of a Happy Life by Sir Henry Wotton

english-home

How happy is he born and taught.
That serveth not another’s will;
Whose armour is his honest thought,
And simple truth his utmost skill

Whose passions not his masters are;
Whose soul is still prepared for death,
Untied unto the world by care
Of public fame or private breath;

Who envies none that chance doth raise,
Nor vice; who never understood
How deepest wounds are given by praise;
Nor rules of state, but rules of good;

Who hath his life from rumours freed;
Whose conscience is his strong retreat;
Whose state can neither flatterers feed,
Nor ruin make oppressors great;

Who God doth late and early pray
More of His grace than gifts to lend;
And entertains the harmless day
With a religious book or friend;

This man is freed from servile bands
Of hope to rise or fear to fall:
Lord of himself, though not of lands,
And having nothing, yet hath all.

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The American Museum in Britain – From Florida to Bath

Hernando de Soto (c1496-1542) Spanish explorer and his men torturing natives of Florida in his determination to find gold. Hand-coloured engraving. John Judkyn Memorial Collection, Freshford Manor, Bath

Hernando de Soto (c1496-1542) Spanish explorer and his men torturing natives of Florida in his determination to find gold. Hand-coloured engraving. John Judkyn Memorial Collection, Freshford Manor, Bath

The print above depicts Spanish explorer Hernando de Soto and his band of conquistadors torturing Florida natives in order to extract information on where one might find gold on the peninsula.  The print is one of many in a collection of prints that belonged to John Judkyn, a Briton who was a noted antiques dealer, collector, and conservator.   I discovered this print on the website for The American Museum in Bath, a British museum that Judkyn helped found and where his life-long collection is housed. Continue reading The American Museum in Britain — From Florida to Bath

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The New American Socialism – Paying for the other guy’s Pension

delray-detroit

American capitalists generally shudder at the word socialism for surely it is a dirty word representing an economic concept reserved for those damned European communists across the pond, however, all Americans, to include the capitalist proselytizers participate in socialism everyday in one form or another. Continue reading The New American Socialism — Paying for the other guy’s Pension

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